Maybe one day I will not start a blog commenting about how horrible I am about updating and ya-dee ya-dee ya-da! Well I have given myself 12 mins so let's get to the chase.
A TON has happen since my spring post, which I hope to actually break down in the next week into proper postings. Items covered will be:
1) The birth of our DAUGHTER
2) The sale/moving of our home
3) the building (or lack there of) of our new home
4) living at the farm
5) Starting Kindergarten
But for now let's cover NOW.
We are currently living with my inlaws, who have graciously welcomed us into their home since we sold our house on Aug 21 - so its almost already been 4 months! And, thankfully, general consensus of the house is a good 4 months. Winter is in full force, as to be expected. But it started later than usually and has been fairly kind. We did have about 4 days of -40, but hey I kind of like those days. You hunker down and power through and have the satisfaction of knowing not only did you survive -40, but you lived. Still did errands with the kids. Still kept going!
Life at the farm is pretty awesome, and will be that much more awesome when we are in our own home! But I am loving being out of town, away from the hustle and bustle. Even though going into town 2 or 3 times a day can be exhausting, and you work harder to be more strategic about getting EVERYTHING done once you are there, we are all really loving it .The boys love running around and having more freedom. I enjoy knowing I don't have to be constantly supervising them so they don't get kidnapped or hit by a car!
Lincoln is finally getting into the routine of Kindergarten. Even though each school day is met with "Is it full day or half day?" And a larger protest if it is full day, it is getting easier for him. We were very proud when his teacher awarded him student of the month for November - he was the second student to receive it in his class. And since the first month was spent with him crying every morning on his way to school - it was a big surprise and he has made great improvements! He can easily spell his name, and can identify almost all the letters. He recently came home with a picture that he drew of the Nativity scene - and it's pretty much the best thing ever. Joseph has 'giant arms and little feet' and Mary looks like an angel. And the angel doesn't look like an angel. And the sheep looks like porcupine and it is AWESOME. We are constantly amazed about how smart he is - he can grasp big concepts and has amazing follow up questions when he and Stephen discuss things like WW2. He also still has his moments when he doesn't get his way or Jack ruins something and its full on crying. But those getting farther between.
Jackson, wow, what do I say? Well let's start with the fact we went to a community supper tonight and in the course of the 2 hours there Jack ran around, jumping on random people's backs, climbing on other peoples tables to get a drink, and tried to shove the light saber he got up his nose. Stephen and I kept looking at each other like - who's kid is that?!?!? He is still completely fearless and a huge risk taker, which is most of the time, a lot of fun. We are really proud of the way he jumps whole heartily into life - always up for something new. He does take more energy than Lincoln - Jack will just decide it's time to go, whether we are at church or the store, and he will leave. So we have to watch him closely. It will be a bit more relaxing when we are out of the "Where is Jack?" stage. We also noticed recently he seems to identify with the villains more the super heros. As he runs around the house yelling, in the CUTEST deep voice "I AM CAPTAIN HOOK!" Or growling "I AM MEGATRON".... I hope this doesn't mean anything. But it is a bit concerning, ha ha ha. He would love to go to school with Lincoln, but I have told him he can't go until he is 4. In the mean time I have told him the the childcare at mom's group is his class. And he takes it quite seriously. He normally wouldn't stay in the child care, but since we have started going to 'school at church', he packs his backpack and enjoys his class. We even saw his 'teacher' at superstore the other day and he was quite excited! And of course we can't forget his trick that Stephen taught him ' pop his collar, point his fingers and say "EH!" Like the fonz. But of course Jack can't remember its 'eh' and always says 'D!".What a kid!
Ellianna.....our beautiful gift from the Lord, our sweet baby girl, Ellianna! Elli is a joy. She is cute and lovely and all things baby :) She is 4 months and can roll stomach to back, has a very strong neck and loves to talk. I am so glad to finally have a girl to talk to :) She loves to hold toys and is now even getting bored, and has to switch scenery or people to keep her entertained. She likes to sit in her bumbo chair on the counter best so she can be a part of all the action. When we lay her on her back, she always pulls her head up like she is trying to sit up - she has been doing that pretty much since birth. So strong. She can easily get to the middle of her back pulled up now. She has started teething, no teeth have cut yet but she loves to chew on everything, especially your hand. The boys ADORE her, and she is smothered in love from the moment she wakes until she goes to sleep. She is the first one Lincoln looks for when he gets home from school and there usually is a fight over her in the morning as each boy wants their own special cuddle time with her while waking up. She has decided not to use a soother, which is totally new for me. So far its been ok - but might be a problem when we start leaving her with Nana for the evening now that she is older. She is pretty good at napping, I'm able to lay her while she is still awake on our bed and most times she will just go to sleep. She is also a stomach sleeper, which is another first for us. She HATES her car seat, and has since birth , which makes life more difficult when we need to do errands or go anywhere with her. As soon as I lay her in her seat she starts screaming, and generally doesn't stop until we take her back out. Sometimes she falls asleep which is such a treat :) More often than not I have to pull her out of her seat and hold her while grocery shopping, which can be hard pushing the cart with one hand and managing a curious 3 yrs old, but some how we manage!
Stephen is working hard at building our house. He is very dedicated and excited to be homesteading. We built and awesome woodshed this summer - just using a hand saw, nails and hammer. It took a bit longer than if we were to use power tools but it was almost therapeutic doing it the old school way! He loves to chop wood and I lovingly call him my lumber jack. He has an awesome beard right now, as it's winter, and I really love it! My rugged mountain man!
Sunday, December 15, 2013
Saturday, May 25, 2013
Spring + New Life!
Life is wonderful, for the most part, these days. May finds us with Lincoln about to graduate preschool. Jackson becoming more mischievous everyday. I am 29 weeks pregnant with our third baby. Stephen is busy as always with the spring season at Paintball. We are in the midst of selling our house and gearing up to build out at the farm. Life is BUSY! But good!
Lincoln is 2 weeks away from being done preschool. He had a pretty good year. It was a battle getting him out the door most mornings - he is not a morning person. But he always had a great time at school. His teacher talked to us a few times about how quiet Lincoln is in class and how she would like him to relax more. So its been a process of us encouraging him to talk nice and loud to Mrs Geradts and other kids in his class. He's getting there :) He continues to amaze me at what he is learning from life, from us and at school. Literally a sponge. Letters continue to not be his strong point, but he is brilliant at building with duplo and lego and loves hot wheels and dinosaurs. He also can have the WORST attitude ever, and it can be very frustrating to deal with. He gets his mind set on something he wants and when we say no he does not take it well. We are trying to be consistent and cut out how much time he spend on the computer and ipad. Its much easier now that summer is here to keep them busy without all the gadgets! He has been our biggest challenge as parents, wouldn't should be surprising since he is the oldest and is the first to introduce us to the next stage of development.
Jackson continues to keep me on my toes and about 2 heartbeats away from a heart attack! He is 3 now and is only about 27lbs, which is really small for his age. Most 2 year olds are bigger than him. We recently under went a round of blood, urine and xray tests that would ordered through a pedatrician. We are still waiting for the results. It was not fun for him or for us to have to put him through all that, but we are thankful that we live in age where we might have some answers as to why he isn't growing. He is still mischivious as ever - likes to let himself out of the house if I don't keep the doors locked. Loves to climb up on my counter and eat sugar out of the sugar bowl or try to cut up his own orange, in the mean time cutting himself. Or how about the time he grabbed my longest knife and waved it up and down singing "I got two pickles, I've got to pickles,". Never. A. Dull. Moment. But at the same time he is my cuddliest, sweetest, most darling little boy. He likes to take my face in his hands and give me the sweetest 3 yr old kisses. He is ALWAYs good to cuddle, and most times his wrestle time with daddy will spontaously turn to cuddle time when mid wrestle he lays down on Stephens chest and snuggles in. He eats, breaths, and sleeps dinosaurs. Its amazing how many dinosaurs he can identify. Of course his ultimate is T-rex King of the dinos! "Draw T-rex mom!" Which is always followed by "Draw spinosaurus!" and then without fail "Draw stegosaurus!" He also has recently developed a love of transformers and I will often hear him, when playing buy himself, commanding his dinosaurs, to "Autbots! Transform + roll out!" He lowers his voice so deep, its darling :) For the most part he is a fairly obedient child, and is just starting to discover what asserting his own will is like. It will be an interesting next 6 months! He is the reason parents have developed leashes - he is wild and unpredictable, always marching to his own beat.
Stephen and I found out we were expecting in November. After holding our breath for 13 weeks we received an ultrasound and verified the baby was healthy and growing. We were so releaved and said many prayers of thanks. Its been a good pregnancy, but I'm not sure if its because its my third pregnancy or if its because I am just getting older, but i sure don't remember it being so hard on my body! I've had low blood pressure, which thankfully straightened itself out. I know have low iron, which I need to bring up before birth in order to reduce the chances of bleeding too much. I always get a sciatic nerve in my pregnancys, but this one seems to be the worst. Granted I am running after 2 (sometimes 7 if I have all the kids I babysit) and we have been packing, and cleaning and cleaning and cleaning as we try to sell out house. So I have been demanding a lot of my body and back. We are all anxious to meet this little one, feel incredibly blessed to have the opportunity to bring another one into our family and are all rooting for a girl :) Even the boys want a little sister. Lincoln sees that math just doesn't make sense - 3 boys in our family and only 1 girl? We need a girl mom! It has been amazing to watch Lincoln fall in love with this baby, as my tummy gets bigger and baby gets more active. He daily asks to give the baby a hug, wrapping his arms around my belly. He will talk to the baby saying "Hey! Are you a boy or a girl?" If I tell him the baby is kicking he eagerly trys to feel too. He has come to terms that it might not be a girl and told me the other day, "Mom even if its a boy I will still love that baby!" And he has also told me "Mom, I am going to love you so much more when you bring that baby home!" or the classic "Mom, I'm going to still love you even when you tummy gets this big!". Jack has been surprisingly indifferent, and actually a bit annoyed. This big belly gets in the way of his cuddling and mom isn't nearly as fun now that she can't wrestle or be jumped on! But he LOVES babies so I am sure he will warm up to his new sibling once he/she is here.
We are excited to be finally building our own house, and are blessed to be able to do it on Stephen's parents land. We have our house listed and are believing for a sale quickly so we can start selling. Winter threw us off a bit this year as it just kept going! We didn't see all the snow gone until the end of APRIL! And its only been gone from the farm since mid-may! We had record breaking amounts of snow this year. So everything is behind from getting the land subdivided to listing our house (we kept waiting for the spring market, except Spring just wouldn't come!)But we are hoping to start in the next couple of weeks and are really excited. It will be crazy with welcoming a new baby in the middle of it all. Especially since I won't be able to help as much as I would like too until probably a month after the baby comes, but we believe this is the right timing and the housing market is really strong here so we should do well on our house. We hope to have chickens, goats, a big garden and to really become more self reliant and get back to our roots. we want to raise our children working hard, doing chores, playing outside all day long.
So that is where we are in May 2013! I'm looking forward to no longer watching kids and just focusing on my, soon to be, 3 blessings!
+
Lincoln is 2 weeks away from being done preschool. He had a pretty good year. It was a battle getting him out the door most mornings - he is not a morning person. But he always had a great time at school. His teacher talked to us a few times about how quiet Lincoln is in class and how she would like him to relax more. So its been a process of us encouraging him to talk nice and loud to Mrs Geradts and other kids in his class. He's getting there :) He continues to amaze me at what he is learning from life, from us and at school. Literally a sponge. Letters continue to not be his strong point, but he is brilliant at building with duplo and lego and loves hot wheels and dinosaurs. He also can have the WORST attitude ever, and it can be very frustrating to deal with. He gets his mind set on something he wants and when we say no he does not take it well. We are trying to be consistent and cut out how much time he spend on the computer and ipad. Its much easier now that summer is here to keep them busy without all the gadgets! He has been our biggest challenge as parents, wouldn't should be surprising since he is the oldest and is the first to introduce us to the next stage of development.
Jackson continues to keep me on my toes and about 2 heartbeats away from a heart attack! He is 3 now and is only about 27lbs, which is really small for his age. Most 2 year olds are bigger than him. We recently under went a round of blood, urine and xray tests that would ordered through a pedatrician. We are still waiting for the results. It was not fun for him or for us to have to put him through all that, but we are thankful that we live in age where we might have some answers as to why he isn't growing. He is still mischivious as ever - likes to let himself out of the house if I don't keep the doors locked. Loves to climb up on my counter and eat sugar out of the sugar bowl or try to cut up his own orange, in the mean time cutting himself. Or how about the time he grabbed my longest knife and waved it up and down singing "I got two pickles, I've got to pickles,". Never. A. Dull. Moment. But at the same time he is my cuddliest, sweetest, most darling little boy. He likes to take my face in his hands and give me the sweetest 3 yr old kisses. He is ALWAYs good to cuddle, and most times his wrestle time with daddy will spontaously turn to cuddle time when mid wrestle he lays down on Stephens chest and snuggles in. He eats, breaths, and sleeps dinosaurs. Its amazing how many dinosaurs he can identify. Of course his ultimate is T-rex King of the dinos! "Draw T-rex mom!" Which is always followed by "Draw spinosaurus!" and then without fail "Draw stegosaurus!" He also has recently developed a love of transformers and I will often hear him, when playing buy himself, commanding his dinosaurs, to "Autbots! Transform + roll out!" He lowers his voice so deep, its darling :) For the most part he is a fairly obedient child, and is just starting to discover what asserting his own will is like. It will be an interesting next 6 months! He is the reason parents have developed leashes - he is wild and unpredictable, always marching to his own beat.
Stephen and I found out we were expecting in November. After holding our breath for 13 weeks we received an ultrasound and verified the baby was healthy and growing. We were so releaved and said many prayers of thanks. Its been a good pregnancy, but I'm not sure if its because its my third pregnancy or if its because I am just getting older, but i sure don't remember it being so hard on my body! I've had low blood pressure, which thankfully straightened itself out. I know have low iron, which I need to bring up before birth in order to reduce the chances of bleeding too much. I always get a sciatic nerve in my pregnancys, but this one seems to be the worst. Granted I am running after 2 (sometimes 7 if I have all the kids I babysit) and we have been packing, and cleaning and cleaning and cleaning as we try to sell out house. So I have been demanding a lot of my body and back. We are all anxious to meet this little one, feel incredibly blessed to have the opportunity to bring another one into our family and are all rooting for a girl :) Even the boys want a little sister. Lincoln sees that math just doesn't make sense - 3 boys in our family and only 1 girl? We need a girl mom! It has been amazing to watch Lincoln fall in love with this baby, as my tummy gets bigger and baby gets more active. He daily asks to give the baby a hug, wrapping his arms around my belly. He will talk to the baby saying "Hey! Are you a boy or a girl?" If I tell him the baby is kicking he eagerly trys to feel too. He has come to terms that it might not be a girl and told me the other day, "Mom even if its a boy I will still love that baby!" And he has also told me "Mom, I am going to love you so much more when you bring that baby home!" or the classic "Mom, I'm going to still love you even when you tummy gets this big!". Jack has been surprisingly indifferent, and actually a bit annoyed. This big belly gets in the way of his cuddling and mom isn't nearly as fun now that she can't wrestle or be jumped on! But he LOVES babies so I am sure he will warm up to his new sibling once he/she is here.
We are excited to be finally building our own house, and are blessed to be able to do it on Stephen's parents land. We have our house listed and are believing for a sale quickly so we can start selling. Winter threw us off a bit this year as it just kept going! We didn't see all the snow gone until the end of APRIL! And its only been gone from the farm since mid-may! We had record breaking amounts of snow this year. So everything is behind from getting the land subdivided to listing our house (we kept waiting for the spring market, except Spring just wouldn't come!)But we are hoping to start in the next couple of weeks and are really excited. It will be crazy with welcoming a new baby in the middle of it all. Especially since I won't be able to help as much as I would like too until probably a month after the baby comes, but we believe this is the right timing and the housing market is really strong here so we should do well on our house. We hope to have chickens, goats, a big garden and to really become more self reliant and get back to our roots. we want to raise our children working hard, doing chores, playing outside all day long.
So that is where we are in May 2013! I'm looking forward to no longer watching kids and just focusing on my, soon to be, 3 blessings!
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Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Typical
It seems to be a trend that I post faithful for a season, and then drop off the face of blog earth. This time I intentionally stopped blogging in June. We walked through a very sad time in our little families life. And I didn't not have the energy for quite a while to celebrate and track what was going on. On June 12th, 2012 I miscarried our 4th child (we have had one previous miscarriage). I was 9 weeks along and the bleeding started out of no where. Initially I wasn't worried, I choosing to be hopeful and positive, giving my body the benefit of the doubt. When the bleeding didn't stop, but nor had it increased, by the next morning, we decided I should go into ER to get checked out - since it was a Sunday. We were unable to schedule an ultra sound until the following day, so the Dr took my blood and checked my levels. At that point, since I was not cramping, and my levels were still good they were still optimistic. But told me if anything changed to come back in. By afternoon the cramping started and I knew it was the end of our pregnancy. We were heart broken to say the least. There is something about miscarrying AFTER you have had the joy of carrying one (or more) babies to full term and having the privilege of raising them. I simply rested, it was all I could do. I continued to bleed and cramp, but thankfully it wasn't that painful. The next day, Monday, I went into the ER to have my ultrasound. This is my second time having an ultrasound far to early in a pregnancy. The second time I have laid on the bed in the hospital holding back tears as I knew what they would say. After waiting a while the Dr called us in and confirmed that yes, the ultrasound showed no sign of life, the baby had probably died around the 6 week mark. Of course, there wasn't anything they could do. They offered to give me a medication to help everything pass, but we declined. I didn't want to interrupt what my body had started. So we went home, and continued to wait. By this point I had been bleeding for 2 full days, and cramping for a day and a half. It wasn't until the third day, a Tuesday, that mercifully, I miscarried our wee one. I was prepared, and had pulled out an old baby blanket both the boys had used. I was able to save the remains, and wrapped them in the blanket - I tried to give our precious baby a tiny bit of dignity.
The miscarriage itself was painless, which I can only say was the Grace of God. Our first miscarriage was extremely painful, almost violent. It was fast and left me in shock as to what my body had just been through. I was very concerned during this miscarriage that it would be just as painful, and that my boys would see me in such pain. But on the Tuesday morning, I woke up and realized my cramps were gone. When I did pass the baby, I felt incredible amount of peace and reassurance. Not that it was extremely sad, don't get me wrong, my heart was breaking - but I felt safe. I felt His presence in the midst of my pain.
About a week after I miscarried we bought a Dahlia Perennial bush and planted it, as well as the baby blanket with the remains of our baby, our at Stephen's parents farm. His mother has a beautiful garden that she takes much pride in - I knew it would be a safe and respectful place to lay our baby to rest and to honor him/her with a beautiful bush that I will watch bloom every year.
When I was in the midst of miscarrying, we saw a seat sale come up for Turkey. We were already planning on Stephen doing a big trip this year, a birthday gift from in honor of his 30th birthday. The price of the tickets were perfectly priced that we could both go to Turkey for what I had already saved for a ticket for him. We saw the timing as nothing short as a small blessing from the Lord. So we booked 2 tickets (well actually 3, as his brother was coming with us) for October. Our trip was amazing, and a great time for us to reconnect as friends, and as husband and wife. But it was also bitter, in the fact that I knew the only reason I was there was because we had lost a baby. On my flight home, I was reading my Bible, and I felt the Lord say "The grieving period is over. Another child is coming!".
So that is it. It took a lot longer to heal from our miscarriage than I imagined. Which is why I didn't feel right about blogging. There are still evenings that I cry, especially as we draw closer to our due date - Jan 15, 2013. And the pain ran much deeper than I imagined as well. But if anything it reaffirmed that I am truly a mother. And that parents are not supposed to out live their children.
At this point, I do and I don't take comfort that I have 2 children in Heaven. It feels weird. And wrong, even though I know in my head that they are in a perfect place with our Savior who has perfect love, I can't help feel like what is more perfect than a mother's love (don't get me wrong, i know my love has a plethora of short comings). Its just not as simple as being thankful they are in Heaven, bc selfishly, I want them here, with me. It hurts my heart more than anyone can know when I think about that fact that I never had a chance to even hold those children, to know their gender - to smell their scent. I'm sure the Lord is not done his work in me in this area yet.
So that was our summer. And now we wait, for our next child!
The miscarriage itself was painless, which I can only say was the Grace of God. Our first miscarriage was extremely painful, almost violent. It was fast and left me in shock as to what my body had just been through. I was very concerned during this miscarriage that it would be just as painful, and that my boys would see me in such pain. But on the Tuesday morning, I woke up and realized my cramps were gone. When I did pass the baby, I felt incredible amount of peace and reassurance. Not that it was extremely sad, don't get me wrong, my heart was breaking - but I felt safe. I felt His presence in the midst of my pain.
About a week after I miscarried we bought a Dahlia Perennial bush and planted it, as well as the baby blanket with the remains of our baby, our at Stephen's parents farm. His mother has a beautiful garden that she takes much pride in - I knew it would be a safe and respectful place to lay our baby to rest and to honor him/her with a beautiful bush that I will watch bloom every year.
When I was in the midst of miscarrying, we saw a seat sale come up for Turkey. We were already planning on Stephen doing a big trip this year, a birthday gift from in honor of his 30th birthday. The price of the tickets were perfectly priced that we could both go to Turkey for what I had already saved for a ticket for him. We saw the timing as nothing short as a small blessing from the Lord. So we booked 2 tickets (well actually 3, as his brother was coming with us) for October. Our trip was amazing, and a great time for us to reconnect as friends, and as husband and wife. But it was also bitter, in the fact that I knew the only reason I was there was because we had lost a baby. On my flight home, I was reading my Bible, and I felt the Lord say "The grieving period is over. Another child is coming!".
So that is it. It took a lot longer to heal from our miscarriage than I imagined. Which is why I didn't feel right about blogging. There are still evenings that I cry, especially as we draw closer to our due date - Jan 15, 2013. And the pain ran much deeper than I imagined as well. But if anything it reaffirmed that I am truly a mother. And that parents are not supposed to out live their children.
At this point, I do and I don't take comfort that I have 2 children in Heaven. It feels weird. And wrong, even though I know in my head that they are in a perfect place with our Savior who has perfect love, I can't help feel like what is more perfect than a mother's love (don't get me wrong, i know my love has a plethora of short comings). Its just not as simple as being thankful they are in Heaven, bc selfishly, I want them here, with me. It hurts my heart more than anyone can know when I think about that fact that I never had a chance to even hold those children, to know their gender - to smell their scent. I'm sure the Lord is not done his work in me in this area yet.
So that was our summer. And now we wait, for our next child!
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